The 2nd week of NTU is ending soon.

I start to wonder if I have made the right choice to study this course.

The modules are more difficult than I expected. I thought I can at least score for a module "Foundations of Mathematics". But it is not that easy. I used to like doing proving questions. But this module made me, kind of afraid of proving. We are supposed to prove maths theorem, e.g. prove that square root of 2 is irrational. Another module "Calculus I", I thought I can handle with it, since I have studied it in CEM previously. But, the calculus is different from what I have learned in CEM. It is much more different.

And, I am studying students from top JCs, from China, Indonesia, etc. All of them are so smart, and of course, hardworking. My disadvantage is that, I have no background of A Level Maths. Last week, I asked my lecturer about his workings. In the end, the course mates beside me, said that they have learned it in JC. It is a maths formulae that they have already remembered. At that moment, I felt like I looked so stupid.

Lastly, I have not known any friends from my course. I feel so lonely at times. I spent 3 hrs break alone in library. I went for lunch alone and shared a table with strangers. Maybe I should take more initiative to know more friends.

Now, I just hope I can survive through this semester. I'm so afraid that I will not be able to score well for my modules. Maybe a Honors Degree is too far fetched for me.